Headline

January 2007 - FREE

IN THE NEWS!

THE “H” IN HOLLYWOOD

STAFF WRITER

Another celebrity with herpes has been revealed by an angry ex-spouse: David Hasselhoff.

Ex-wife Pamela Bach is suing the Baywatch beefcake to overturn a pre-nuptial agreement. Among the accusations she hurls in court documents quoted by Britain’s The Sun: “At the time of our marriage, I was not informed that the petitioner had herpes. He failed to tell me about his condition for many years, potentially exposing me to the extremely dangerous virus.”

MEDICATIONS:

Wal-Mart drug plan goes national

STAFF WRITER

Wal-Mart has already rolled out its $4 generic drugs, including acyclovir, at 3,800 stores in 49 states while Target is matching the program at 1,287 pharmacies in 47 states. One of our readers has confirmed their Target pharmacy purchase of 30 capsules for $4 at a Hollywood Florida location.

The retail giants said in September they were planning the national launch of the cheap meds in January after starting in Florida, but decided to speed up the program due to popular demand.

Wal-Mart is selling the $4 generics in all states except North Dakota, where it is not allowed to run pharmacies. In California, Minnesota and Pennsylvania, it must charge $9 for 55 drugs due to state laws that prohibit below-cost pricing if it could harm competitors’ business.

Valtrex.com

Those wishing to reduce their number of genital herpes outbreaks and wish to try suppressive therapy using Valtrex can go to the www.valtrex.com website where you can save up to $10 on each prescription.

There are no data on the safety and effectiveness of suppressive therapy with Valtrex for more than one year.

Progress on vaccines

STAFF WRITER

Research into herpes vaccines is advancing on several fronts.

The vaccine in the final stages of research is Herpevac, from GlaxoSmithKline, manufacturer of Valtrex. The National Institute of Allergy and Infectious Diseases has teamed up with GlaxoSmithKline to test Herpevac on about 7,500 women in 40 cities throughout the United States and Canada.

This will mark Herpevac’s third go-round of clinical trials. Previous tests showed the drug, administered by injection, reduced the risk of infection by about 75 percent, according to the NIAID, a division of the National Institutes of Health.

In San Francisco, the NIAID is also funding tests of a microbicide called VivaGel to prevent herpes infections. The cream, which is applied vaginally twice a day, is manufactured by Starpharma of Australia.

Meanwhile, the NIH has awarded a $700,000 grant to the Southwest Research Institute in San Antonio, Texas, to pursue a line of drugs to prevent, herpes, HIV and HPV transmission.

The Institute’s work focuses on using RNA (ribonucleic acid) as an interfering agent that will stop replication of a viral cell.

The NIAID estimates that one in four adult women in the United States have genital herpes.

Ask & Answer

STAFF WRITER

Q: I've had herpes for 11months now and I just started dating again. How and when do I tell someone about "H"?

Tampa, Fl.

A: There are several theories on the best way to tell a non-H partner...

Some people say it's best to be upfront and tell them right away. This avoids accusations later of "you should have told me earlier and not wasted my time" or "why did you string me along and allow me to develop feelings for you".

However, most people say it's better to wait until that time when sexual intimacy is the next step, but not when you are in the heat of the moment. Wait until you have developed a rapport with the person and feel confident that they will not betray your privacy.

Choose a quiet time and place and say that you are about to tell them something of a highly personal nature and regardless of how they feel about it, they will keep this confidential.

Express that you are telling them this personal information because you respect & care about them and wouldn't want what happened to you, to happen to them. Then say you have a very common sexually transmitted disease carried by about one in five people: genital herpes.

Explain that this is not a lethal disease, can be controlled by medication & is largely considered a minor medical condition. Use of suppressive drugs and a condom is highly effective at reducing the likelihood of transmission,

Obviously, you have no control over how they will react to your honesty. If they accept you, you have the basis of a solid relationship. If you receive a negative reaction, keep in mind that it is the virus they are rejecting and not you. There are other people out there who will accept you as you are.

Got a question?

Ask and we'll try to find the answer:

happeningseditor@hotmail.com

Get well soon!

Special thanks goes out to Susan for jumping in last minute & hosting the December 27th HELP meeting in Pompano Beach, Florida due to Darlene & Jim's medical absence.

We wish you both a speedy recovery and look forward to seeing you again at the next HELP meeting on Wednesday, January 24, 2007.

Speedy recovery to cousin Jeff and the success of his Chemo-Therapy.

For more information about the South Florida HELP support group meetings go to our support group link.

Sister organizations wishing to post their HELP support group information under our support group link should make their submission to the happeningseditor@hotmail.com.

My Story

Hi, I am 37 years old. I have a wonderful family, a great career, and own a decent little house. I'm a handsome guy, at least that is what my friends tell me. I'm single, no kids and never been married. I am mad. No that is a lie. I am scared. What am I scared of? Being alone. Never having children. Never meeting someone who will accept me. Where does all this fear and anger come from? The fact that I have herpes.

My life before herpes was not complicated. I was 20 years old. Like many young people, I was looking for acceptance. I was always the outsider. Never had much confidence when it came to talking to girls. I was the kid in school that got picked on by the jocks. Well, I met a girl who I thought was an angel. After months of talking and some harmless flirting, we ended up dating. One night she told me she had herpes. She was crying hysterically. She said she wasn't a bad girl. She was terrified that I would turn my back on her. Well how could I? What kind of person would I be if I turned my back on this crying angel?

So, I held her hand and told her everything was going to be OK. I told her I wouldn't turn my back on her and I would be right by her side. Twelve months later, my little angel broke up with me. Turns out she had been cheating on me for four months with a guy at work. Little did I know that wasn't the worst thing about the break up. What's that saying about nice guys again? A week or so after we broke up, I started getting the symptoms. I denied it to myself, because I thought I had been careful. When I woke up in morning and found that I had the symptoms of herpes, there was no question in my mind of what it was. I didn't need a physician to tell me what was wrong but I went ahead and got diagnosed in the hope that it was something else. I cannot believe that someone cannot know they have herpes when they look down at their genitals and see a horrible looking and painful sore forming. It just doesn't make sense to me how people can say they had no idea something was wrong.

My life since herpes has been very difficult. I attribute that to my own psychology and feelings of self worth. Herpes has just made a bad situation worse for me. I have been angry ever since. The doctor recommended I see a therapist to deal with the feelings. Being angry was a lot easier and cost me less money. I spent a long time alone. I didn't date because I didn't want to face the rejection. My friends have no idea why I don't date. I don't want them to know I have this disease. I don't want them to reject me. My family doesn't know I have herpes because I don't want my family getting upset. I just got angry.

I have tried dating non-HSV women. Three times as a matter of fact. It always starts off great. But after a while I know I have to have the talk. And the same thing happened each time. The phone calls go unanswered, days pass without contact, then finally I get a phone call. It's always the same thing. Though I am a great guy, the girl just can't risk getting this disease. Herpes isn't a big deal as long as you don't mind being turned down by women. One girl even accused me of being dirty. Like I got herpes from having sex with hundreds of girls. I guess her parents didn't let her take the sex ed class in fifth grade.

I tried going to one of those socials where they hang all those green balloons all over the place. I really tried going into this with a positive attitude. It all fell apart after 20 minutes. The meeting place was a night club. The organizers set up a corner of the bar with several green balloons. The first thing I noticed was the ratio of men to women. The thing was a sausagefest. There were five guys to each girl. I thought the statistics said one person in five has herpes. Where are the girls that have this disease?

Then I noticed them. Call me shallow. Call me superficial. These were not the most attractive girls I have ever seen. I know it's the inside that counts, but I really believe that there has to be physical attraction between two people. I think most people feel this way, but are scared to admit it. The last thing I noticed were the balloons. Those green balloons that reminded me of my disease. The balloons reminded me that I would not find acceptance in the rest of the club. Those stupid green balloons. I hate green balloons.

On the topic of honesty about herpes; have I ever been dishonest? The answer is yes. Why? Fear of rejection is a big one. And the second is that sometimes the need to connect with someone that I find sexually attractive surpasses common sense and honesty. Do I feel guilty? Of course I do. Do I feel horrible for being a liar? Without a doubt. My parents raised me to be honest. Does this happen often? No, because as I said the guilt is overwhelming and usually puts me in an incredible state of depression. But as I said, sometimes the need to feel and connect intimately with another human being surpasses good sense and respect for another human being. Does this justify my actions? Absolutely not.

I am just fed up with the sugar coated garbage that so many people with herpes say about having herpes. Everyone pretends to be so damn happy and cheerful. I see the same people all over those herpes dating sites. I understand they are trying to make the best out of a bad situation. But I would honestly like to hear someone complain about it just to know that I am not the only one who hates having herpes. The whole theory of one in five people having herpes is just garbage to me. I have been in the medical profession for 15 years. In 15 years I have only come across three people who have herpes. I know some of them may have just neglected to tell me, but you figure I would have caught some of those people in a lie when I check their prescriptions. It's probably just some persons' way of promoting safer sex by making a warning that a lot of people have herpes in the world.

I don't understand why HIV and AIDS have received social acceptance. Especially when in this country the disease is most often associated with unacceptable sexual behavior or the most disgusting form of drug use. Seems like everyone knows someone who has had HIV or AIDS. It seems like in order to receive social acceptance, a disease or illness needs to receive two things; a cute colored ribbon and the support of celebrities. Is it true that only one celebrity in all of Hollywood has herpes? What would happen if some of Hollywood's most popular celebrities came forward and admitted to having herpes? Would it destroy their careers? God knows having AIDS or HIV seems to make someone a martyr or superstar. So I ask the world, WHERE IS MY DAMN RIBBON???

Life has been tough since herpes. I honestly wish I could see a light at the end of this damn tunnel. I feel alone. I am scared. I know it's not good to say this, but I am jealous of my friends. My friends are all married and have kids. My best friend has two wonderful children. A boy and a girl. I get sad when I think that I may never find a woman to give me two children. Lets face it, I'm 37 and I'm not really attracting women who can have safe pregnancies anymore. Now I'm being judgmental.

I get angry when I hear the guys at work bitching about their wives and kids. They should be grateful they have someone waiting for them when they get home. I come home to an empty house. I'm too busy for a dog and my allergies make me very picky about cats. But honestly, it's not the same as to coming home to a woman who loves me and two kids who think I am the greatest thing since sliced bread. My parents are getting older. I really wanted them to enjoy grandchildren. I honestly do not know if I will ever give them that joy. So that's my take on having herpes. It's devastated me physically and emotionally. I'm not happy. The only thing I am sure of is that I really hate having this and I am very scared for my future.

T, Palm Beach, Florida

Share your story, send it to happeningseditor@hotmail.com.

Anonymity will be protected.

Editor, webmaster & graphic design by Scott Evans: evansprod@aol.com